Wednesday, May 02, 2007

My sister..


“Why are you so fat, now?” my sister jested. “You don’t want to slim down aa”.
I know I have put on a lot of weight. I can't wear most of my office attire now..and can't afford to buy anymore. So I have resorted to wearing the good old faithful baju kurung.

“Can’t help it..I am happy la.”

“Not a nice way to celebrate happiness, is it..being fat..” My sister quipped.

Now the annoyance set in, mainly triggered by guilt of course..of not watching what I eat and not exercising as I should.

I had to come up with something...hmmm

“There was a time when we didn’t have enough to even have a proper meal. I can’t keep coming to you to ask for help..I know you will never deny us, but i also know you had your own problems too..and I have seven, ok.” I began..

“Do you know that we used to go eat at the Mamak shop and really tawakkal. I would tell the kids..ok..now we have only enough for half a roti canai each, ok. Let us make doa that Allah will make this sufficient for us, ok, that this will be filling enough for us and will give us enough energy to carry on. Be thankful that we do have food. Don't worry, this is temporary..things are going to get better..trust me.."

Now that was what we used to go through during the first few months ..

Now I can afford the simple pleasures of buying good food, why not..
What better way to show gratitude than to eat what is there, what I like. We used to look at chocolates and salivate, and it used to break my heart when the little ones ask for some and I couldn’t afford any. And of course la, we share la what we have with those who don’t."

Now that was almost a full discourse ...giggle.

My sister pouted with a glint in her eyes..which said, "Excuses, excuses" written all over it.

Looking back, I realised we have come a long way from those days when I almost lost my self esteem and all my dreams. I was just living from day to day. All I knew was I had to live for my children. I was so fortunate to have my mother, my sister and my brother who were always there for me. My sister especially, never failed to inspire me. When i was down, she would tug me from the ever demolishing state of self pity. She has been a pillar of strength and never once has she ever denied me her help. I also am so blessed with friends who were ever ready to help. In fact I need not ask, they sensed and they held out their hands. All these people offered whatever they had, their ears, their shoulders to be wet by my tears, while others emptied their purses to help put my feet back firmly on the ground, they made sure that i could stand on my own. They saw my transformation into someone different, not very amiable at times, but they never deserted me. These friendships, some forged so long ago, when I was growing up and studying locally and overseas, while others when i first started working, have been my CPR at the most critical of times..

During these trying times, I saw that pure hearts are simply pure hearts. It need not be cloaked in any form of dress code. They transcend race, faith and every other criteria which man created to categorise the human race. It simply shines through sincere acts of compassion and kindness. And you can see it gleam even in the darkest of rooms.

I just hope that I will be able to return the same favour to someone in need, one day. If I can come out of this..anyone can. They just need some firm push from sincere hearts,like i was lucky enough to have.

Now time to figure out how to get back into those office attire...

4 comments:

Anonymous said...

don't talk about being fat. i have put on 10kgs in the last ten years. i am trying extremely hard to lose now. OMG! it is so difficult, despite gyming, and exercise and what not, the fats are so degil and are still stuck to my insides.

fulltime mom

ummi said...

Thank you for dropping by at my blog, anonymous. I understand exactly what you just said..at least you got time to go gyming, now that should be good for our health..good luck in your efforts..sure can one :-). We mothers always achieve what we set out to do ;-)

Anonymous said...

DEar Shakirah, here is the original text. TQ. (alang):

'Collector of Broken Wives': New Novel Explores Polygamy in America

OAKDALE, Calif., May 8 /PRNewswire/ -- Buck Buchan presents a controversial and eye-opening story about a man

and his five wives living in California in his new book, "Collector of Broken Wives" (now available through AuthorHouse).

Tom Dalton first hears the term "polygamy" when he is 15 years old. At the same time, he finds himself very attracted to

two of his mother's friends from work, Victoria Rhodes and Tracy Thompson. Despite the fact that they are eight years

older than him, five years later they become his first two wives, beginning Tom's journey in the polygamous lifestyle.

Tom eventually accumulates five wives, each of them hurt and broken from previous failed marriages. Vicki's marriage

was shattered, and she had to struggle with the courts during divorce proceedings. Tracy's marriage disintegrates over her

husband's adultery and lack of interest. His third wife is 12 years older than him and a two-time loser in marriage. His

fourth and fifth wives are also traumatized by divorce.

Tom begins spreading the concept of polygamy to his friends and residents of the mountain village where he takes his

wives for their honeymoons. In the process, he helps create 10 other polygamous families to create a Scottish- style clan.

Working together, the clan generates a seven-figure legal defense fund and a comprehensive medical plan.

Despite opposition from family and friends and trouble from the wives' ex- husbands, Tom's family provides a positive

example of non-Mormon polygamy. "This is a story of how the polygamous lifestyle can exist, even flourish, anywhere in

our nation," says Buchan. "While the novel is written to entertain, it is also written to stir up controversy."

Buchan is a native of California and currently lives with his wife in the Sacramento area. In the mid-'90s, he recognized the

presence of polygamous families outside of the state of Utah and began researching marriages of one man to more than

one wife, as well as the phenomena of women marrying men considerably younger than themselves and the effects of

divorce on women. "Collector of Broken Wives" is his first book.

AuthorHouse

ummi said...

Terima kasih alang, kerana menghantar rencana dalam bahasa asal. Agak-agak sudah keluar belum buku ini di Malaysia